But I’m scared…

"But I'm scared of everything...of it all"

I remember hearing this from a client a long time ago and it popped back into my head again today when another teacher asked for some advice on Tokophobia - the dread & fear of pregnancy and childbirth that some women may experience.

If this is you and you are currently pregnant there are many things that you can do.

Firstly, don't mentally scrabble away from these feelings. You need to see it for what it is. Face it. Look at it. Take its measure.

See the fear in front of you. Separate from you, distanced from you, perhaps the other side of the room or outside in the garden.

What form does it take? What colour? What image?
What does it mean to you...this fear you hold?

Then look at the roots. There are roots from a fear or phobia like those on a large tree. They travel down into the earth to sustain and keep this fear alive.

Where do these roots go? How deep are they? If you follow the roots of this fear down where do you reach? What do you find?.

These roots may take you back in the past...a long way...or a little way.
A word said. An experience had. A story told. A picture seen.

Find this. See it.
Then see it again.

When you find the root. When you can sit honestly and quietly facing the cause of this fear you can take action.

If it is too big for you then keep it at the end of the garden and find someone who can help you to diminish it. A hypnotherapist, an EFT practitioner, a psychotherapist with experience of working in maternity, a Human Givens practitioner. Work with them, getting closer and closer until you can control and then diminish the cause. Leaving you free again.

If you feel safe to explore it yourself, speak it out loud. EFT Tap on it. Breathe it in and then out. Alter it, question it and change it. Look it in the eye and see it for what it is.

This fear. This feeling of being scared.

Because when you are on the other side your birth will look and feel very different indeed.